IT GETS BETTER - A Post by Lindsey Frost.

Hello lovelies! 
Lindsey on her wedding day - what a beautiful lady!

Below, please enjoy a post from my friend Lindsey Frost from hew new blog, Nooch and Nuptials. A dedicated vegan, animal activist, and newly married lady, Lindsey is a necessary emerging voice in the world of vegan blogging. I am honored to have been a part of Lindsey's journey towards compassion, and I hope that this post will inspire you to keep going on your own. Take it away, Lindsey!

by Lindsey Frost of Nooch and Nuptials

I think we need an "It Gets Better" campaign for vegetarians and vegans.  

Parents giving you hell about your veg lifestyle?  
It gets better.  

Friends mocking your soy consumption?  
It gets better.  

Complete strangers in the grocery store asking you about protein?  
Nope, sorry, that one's not going anywhere.

Life as a new vegetarian or vegan can be extraordinarily lonely, particularly in places outside of major metropolitan areas where the lifestyle is less understood.  Newbies are often (rightly!) passionate about sharing their new lifestyle, but many find that their enthusiasm falls of deaf ears.  It can be isolating.

When I first began leaning into a vegan lifestyle, I was braced for the worst.  You see, I had been the worst. When my friend Lindsay of Kiss Me, I'm Vegan! fame went vegan years ago, I was a jerk.  As the established host and chef for our group of friends, I had a hard time adjusting to the change.  It felt like a rejection of everything I knew - Southern food and hospitality, served with loads of butter and bacon.  Lindsay's change was scary for me, and I reacted terribly.  It's something I still feel very guilty about.

Karma, as it turns out, is a bitch.  Though I thought I was prepared to deal with the backlash when I went vegan, the fervor of some of the negative reactions from friends and family was still shocking and painful.  But you know what?  It does get better.  Over time, the people around you adjust or they don't.  You learn to live with both types, celebrating those who have embraced your changes and trying your best to love the others where they are. 

Struggling with reactions to your new lifestyle?  Here are my suggestions for getting through:

  • Find Your Community: I don't know any other vegans in Chattanooga beyond my quasi-vegan parents (a story for another day), but I feel like I know thousands of vegans across the country thanks to the internet.  Blogs, discussion boards, Facebook groups - they all help.  Need some suggestions for online resources?  E-mail me!  Find people who share your values, even if they're hundreds of miles away.  
  • Find Your Inspiration: I am extraordinarily lucky to call Steven Todd Smith of Ahimsa Life Coaching a dear friend.  Steve and I met almost a decade ago in New York, and even though he's now in Los Angeles and I'm in Chattanooga, he's still pushing me and inspiring me.  If I'm having a rough patch, I know I can pick up the phone and call Steve for a little veggie inspiration.  Find a person who can help you back up when you fall, and you'll be a much, much happier vegan.  
  • Find Your Heroes:  My husband is an omnivore, but he's my hero.  He supports me in everything I do, gladly devours the products of my culinary adventures, and shuts down the haters.  It's crazy sexy.   A couple of nights ago, we were at dinner with family and friends when a friend of my mom's starting asking question after question about what I eat, what I don't eat, where I get my protein, what I do about calcium, etc. etc.  When the questioning started to get mean and defensive, the husband shut it down with his trademark ease and humor.  He's never cruel or angry, but he always, always protects his family.  Find someone who will stand up for you even if they don't agree with you.  
  • Find Your Voice: When I first went veg, I attempted to respond to every comment or criticism with humor.  Eventually though, self-deprecating became self-defeating, and I realized that laughing everything off wasn't getting me very far in changing hearts and minds.  I then tried on intellectual vegan, scary vegan, angry vegan, and sad vegan.  None of it worked, and I just got more and more frustrated.  At last, I recalled the words of a very, very wise man.  The Reverend Forrest Church advised his congregants to "want what you have, do what you can, and be who you are."  My philosophy on sharing my lifestyle others follows a similar model: share with them what you know, feed them all you can, and love them where they are.  Find your way of telling, showing, and loving others.  

To learn more about Lindsey's blog, visit


Cheryl Salinas said…
Welcome Lindsey and congratulations! I love your post. Hi to you too Lindsay!!
Holly H said…
WOW, good points, but the title is so so so outrageous. To reappropriate the "it get's better" project by a straight person is horribly inappropriate and VERY offensive. i am in shock that no one else has mentioned this already. for the record, the original intention, as a venue for LGBTQ find hope and to find mentors in the aftermath of so many youth suicides, can be found here:
Holly H said…
Lindsey said…
Hi Holly, that was certainly not my intention, and I offer my sincere apologies. For the record, the title was my own from my original blog post - Lindsay had nothing to do with it. If you'd like to get in touch with me directly, my contact info is on my blog. Thank you for sharing your response. Lindsey